coffee in the face probably isn't nearly as much fun as pie

i was at starbucks yesterday, standing at the counter, ordering my iced grande caramel macchiato, minding my own business... i paid the lady, put my wallet away and went to turn around, when i felt someone run into my elbow. i looked over my shoulder and saw that a lady had bumped into my elbow with her hand that was holding her coffee. and in slow motion, the friggin coffee leaps out of the tiny little hole in the lid, (and it wasn't just a drop of coffee, it was like a mouthful) goes into the air, and lands directly on her face. her entire face was soaked. it looked like she just got off of splash coffee mountain. she was pretty stunned and kind of stood there in shock. i apologized, asked her if she was okay and got her some napkins while she recovered from her catatonic state. she grabbed two napkins and started cleaning herself up and i asked her again if she was okay... she did not say ONE word to me. i have several issues with this...

first of all, it wasn't my fault. funnily (yes, i've decided that is, in fact, a word) enough, when someone is paying at the counter, eventually they're going to be done paying and turn around to leave. so maybe, just maybe, if you're walking behind these people, you should watch where you're going with your hot coffee in your hand.

secondly, it wasn't my fault! i apologized out of courtesy because i felt bad that it happened. i didn't sit at the counter and plan on how i was going to turn, just as this lady with her coffee walked by, so she'd get it right in the face. and even if i had, she wouldn't know that. so if i'm apologizing, even when it's unwarranted, maybe you should respond and acknowledge that i exist.

lastly, it wasn't my fault and i got you effing napkins!! how hard is it to say thank you? two syllables, that's it.

so i put the rest of the napkins on the counter and i walked away.